Hello there beautiful people! As you can see, things are lookin’ verrrry different around here and I am so thrilled by all the positive feedback I’ve received over the blog’s makeover. What a way to start the week!
For today’s post I decided to write about something that has been playing on my mind a lot over the past couple of months and that is how to deal with mean people.
Someone says some not-so-nice things to you, what do you do? Do you just suck it up? Do you fight back?!
It’s really important to me that I always try my best to be a kind person, no matter the circumstance. However, when someone starts to verbally attack you, you wonder whether being nice is the best option. For that matter, how do you even handle these situations gracefully?!
After some long and hard thinking I’ve come to a few conclusion, but I would love to hear your thoughts on the matter!
Unfortunately in the world we live in today, people glorify bitchiness, associating it with superiority and strength, when in fact it’s poor self-esteem and emotional baggage that causes them to lash out at others. By lashing out they hope to bring other people down to their level of unhappiness, making themselves feel better – misery loves company, after all. If these people were truly happy about themselves and their lives, they wouldn’t feel the need to bring others down.
On the other hand, people associate niceness as being fake, fragile or weak. They couldn’t be more wrong. There is so much strength in kindness. To be able to endure pain and sadness from the hands of others and then still choose to show love and compassion in this world makes you all the more powerful.
Understanding this really does make a big difference. Now you can see that their hurtful words say more about them then they ever will you. Their words, although aimed at you, speak of how unhappy they are inside. As hard as it can be in the moment, try not to take their words personally, because it truly doesn’t have anything to do with you.
In fact, sometimes it’s merely a twisted compliment. Ironically, their belittling comments often stem from jealousy; you possess a quality they wish they had. Are you familiar with the Taylor Swift Lyric “People throw rocks at things that shine”?
So, what about getting even? Fighting back sure does get tempting when you’re being verbally attacked. However, I think it’s in this moment, where your character shines through the most. You have a chance to be the bigger person, take it. I mean, is getting back at them really necessary, because you’ve already kind of won. Think about it – you’re the one who is happy within yourself and doesn’t feel the need to bring others down. By all means stand up for yourself but come from a place of kindness, they obviously need it.
Above all don’t forget that YOU are in charge of how you feel about yourself. No one else can determine your value and you certainly don’t need to justify your existence or life choices to anyone. I love the saying by Eleanor Roosevelt that says “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent”.
I’ve decided that every time I have to face a mean person, I’m going to use it as a challenge; a chance to grow into the person that I want to be – someone who is kind and doesn’t give others the power to taint her thoughts.
As for the Regina George’s in the world (if you didn’t get that reference do yourself a favour and go watch Mean Girls!), every second of every day is a chance to turn your life around. I truly do believe that there is a nice person hidden inside everyone; it simply depends on which qualities we choose to nurture. I promise you, choosing kindness will make you feel so much better than hate ever will.
Anyways, that’s enough rambling for me tonight. I really hope I helped to provide a different perspective on dealing with mean people. At the end of the day – the world can always use a bit more kindness.
Do you have any other advice?! Let me know in the comments below!